


My Tears Ricochet

by emegubler



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Based on a Taylor Swift Song, Behavioral Analysis Unit (Criminal Minds), Bisexual Emily Prentiss, Bookstores, Cancer Arc, Caring Derek Morgan, Caring Spencer Reid, Comfort, Criminal Minds (US TV) Season/Series 07, Derek Morgan & Spencer Reid Friendship, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Late Night Conversations, Love Confessions, Love Letters, Lung Cancer, Mentions of Cancer, Non-Graphic Smut, Original Character Death(s), Original Character(s), POV Third Person, Penelope Garcia & Spencer Reid Friendship, Protective Aaron Hotchner, Protective Siblings, Romance, Sad, Sad Ending, Sad and Happy, Sad with a Happy Ending, Sick Character, Spencer Reid Angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-16 21:48:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29214420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emegubler/pseuds/emegubler
Summary: When Adelaide Sutton got diagnosed with stage four lung cancer she looked over at her brother and told him that she would be okay as long as she could arrive to her death late and in love. Adelaide Sutton did just that. When Spencer Reid and Adelaide Sutton met it was no coincidence. Aphrodite herself would agree that Adelaide Sutton was made to love Spencer Reid, and Spencer Reid was made to be Adelaide's one and only. Some would argue that it was cruel of the universe to make Spencer Reid fall in love with Adelaide Sutton, but the thing about love is it lasts forever. Even if Adelaide didn't.(Based on Taylor Swift's song My Tears Ricochet)DISCLAIMERS:***This book takes place during season seven but I imagined season 12 Reid! Also, this book is an original character au, please know there will be some character descriptions. Also, please remember that everyone is human and words can leave an impact forever. Please if you do not have anything nice to comment, do not comment it. Kindness is always the best way to go! Final note, PLEASE do not make Dilaudid jokes. Thank you lovely humans and I hope that you enjoy my book!!-I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE CRIMINAL MINDS CHARACTERS-
Relationships: Spencer Reid/Original Character(s), Spencer Reid/Original Female Character(s), Spencer Reid/Other(s)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 17





	1. goodness from the universe

Technically speaking there are seven wonders of the world. Spencer Reid can recite every piece of information there is about the seven wonders of the world without a second thought. That is why when he met Adelaide Sutton on July 17th 2015 he was speechless. He knew every fact there was about the seven wonders of the world, and yet he was convinced that he ran into an eighth wonder that he knew nothing about. He wanted to know about this eighth wonder though. Adelaide Sutton was a soul that radiated pure ecstasy. Her eyes were filled with the richest of honey, and her voice spoke with the lilt of an angel. She smelt of old books and vanilla. There were rings on each of her fingers, and if you paid attention closely enough you could see the small ace of cards tattooed on her wrist. In the mind of Spencer Reid, Adelaide was so imperfectly perfect that it hurt the human eye to look at her. But Spencer Reid wanted to spend every waking moment staring into her honey filled eyes. When Spencer Reid ran into Adelaide Sutton that day, it was no coincidence. Aphrodite herself would agree that Adelaide Sutton was made to love Spencer Reid, and Spencer Reid was made to be her one and only. July 17th 2015 was the beginning of Spencer and Adelaides great big love story. The thing about love though is that the more you love, the more you suffer. Spencer knew that loving Adelaide was worth it though. And as for Adelaide, she would not have wished to spend her final moments with anyone other than Spencer. 

Adelaide worked at a small bookstore in Quantico, Virginia and was well known by the locals for her contagious smile. The bookstore was Adelaide's happy place, she loved the concept of being in one location that held thousands of different stories that could automatically teleport you to an entirely different universe. Even on her hardest days Adelaide wore nothing but a smile when she was in the bookstore, it was almost worrisome as you would think she had the smile tattooed on her face. Spencer Reid moved into the apartment complex across the street from the bookstore two weeks prior to meeting Adelaide. He had originally moved to be closer to work, and never in a million years would he think that his move would lead to him meeting the love of his life. Much to his dismay, his boss, Aaron Hotchner, gave him the day off which motivated him to walk across the street and buy a new book. At approximately 1:04 PM on July 17th Spencer walked into the bookstore and began searching for a new book. 

Adelaide was an awfully clumsy person, and more often than not would find herself tripping over air. She carried five books in her hands and was searching for the spots to shelve them in as she tripped over herself and fell onto Spencer Reid. Adelaide quickly ripped herself off of Spencer and began to turn more red than a strawberry in the middle of summer.  
“Oh my goodness, I am so sorry.” Adelaide said with a hint of laughter in her voice. 

“Please don’t apologize, we’re all a little clumsy sometimes. In fact recent studies have proved that some people are just born with lower visual and verbal memory performance causing them to be prone to errors in coordination. So technically speaking you can’t help it.” Spencer helped Adelaide pick up the books as they stood up. 

“You seem very smart and for that I am currently very thankful because it is providing me with a reasoning behind falling on top of you. My name is Adelaide, it is the greatest of pleasures to fall on you.” Adelaide shed a small giggle as she said this. She would be lying if she didn’t say that she was mesmerized by Spencer Reid. He looked like a story that she wanted to read.  
“My name is Doctor Spencer Reid. But uh- you could just call me Spencer. It was a pleasure to break your fall Adelaide.” Spencer couldn’t help but admire the vibrant woman standing in front of him. Adelaide was wearing a flowy floral skirt topped with an offish white top. Her hair was down in its natural waves, and a light blush spread across her cheekbones. She looked as if she belonged in a music video, and Spencer didn’t know how to comprehend that such beauty existed.  
“A doctor huh? Fancy. It is very nice to meet you Spencer.” Adelaide slowly scrunched her nose up nervously as she shed a small smile towards Spencer.  
“Ah yes, very fancy, but I am not a medical doctor. I have three PhDs. One in mathematics, one in chemistry, and a final one in engineering.” Adelaide looked at Spencer and was awestruck as he said this. “So I was correct, you are indeed very smart. You intrigue me Spencer Reid.” Adelaide was telling nothing but the truth as she said this. For some reason something in Adelaide felt drawn towards Spencer as if a piece of her was craving to be known by him.  
“Well Adelaide I am happy to report that you intrigue me as well.” Adelaide had begun to place books on the shelf as Spencer watched her. “Well Spencer, lucky for you I am a firm believer that when you feel a push to know something, you do everything in your power to gain that knowledge. So I am going to propose that we take this mutual feeling of interest in one another and do something with it.” 

That was one of the first things that Spencer will always recall about meeting Adelaide. She hadn’t even hesitated to bring her laughter into Spencer’s life. Instead, Adelaide jumped quickly into getting to know Spencer, and while she had not known it at the time, she began to carve her initials on the base of his heart, his bloodstream only flowing with love for her. 

“How about coffee at the diner down the block next Saturday morning?” Adelaide turned to look at Spencer with pure excitement painted on her face after he said this. “Meet me there at 9 AM sharp. I am looking forward to it Spencer Reid.”  
“As am I Adelaide.” Adelaide began to turn and walk away from Spencer until he quickly yelled for her to stop. “Before you go, what’s your last name? I find it unfair that you know mine and yet I haven’t a clue what yours is.” Adelaide’s response was simple and quick.  
“Sutton. My name is Adelaide Sutton.”  
And with that Adelaide parted back to the front of the store, and Spencer Reid walked back to his apartment with a feeling of pure bliss. 

Adelaide knew that she was getting sicker, she felt it more and more everyday. But the moment she ran into Spencer, that didn’t matter. Adelaide felt nothing but pure tranquility after meeting Spencer Reid, and she hoped it could stay like that for a while. That was the thing about Adelaide, she wanted to die with passion, not boredom, so when she felt even just a fragment of passion for something she held onto it like a lifeline. 

Later that day Adelaide went home to her apartment. The walls of Adelaide’s apartment were scattered with different trinkets that made up a piece of her heart. One wall held a series of polaroids that told the stories of the people she loved. Across from it was a wall that held several paintings, and on the third visible wall a white bookshelf stood tall holding all of Adelaide’s most prized books. Adelaide’s apartment was simplistic however it told a story of what she held closest to her heart. If you looked around her apartment you could unpack a lot of who she was, and what the chapters of her story held. The tall bookshelf told people she was the bookstore girl. The strategically hung polaroids told you who she valued most. The first polaroid was of her next to a taller man who had a similar smile. They were at a lake, and their faces were filled with nothing but mischief. The caption on the polaroid read “no matter where”. Next to the first polaroid was another polaroid captioned “August + Ace.” The picture displayed Adelaide smiling in a hospital room next to a nurse her age who was crossing his eyes and putting up a peace sign in the picture. Not only did the polaroids tell a story of who she loved most, but each of them depicted the memories that Adelaide valued most. The paintings on the third wall told you that Adelaide could find the beauty in even the most abstract of things. Everything in her apartment told you a beautifully built piece of who she was, but the one thing in the apartment that stood out most was the messily scattered group of orange bottles that lined the kitchen counter. Adelaide hated to be the sick girl. She loved to be the bookstore girl. The girl with the smile. The sister, or the friend. Adelaide loved a lot about who she was. But she hated to be the girl who woke up sicker everyday. 

After arriving at her apartment Adelaide walked inside to be greeted by the same man who was in the first polaroid, her brother Bowie. Bowie was three years older than Adelaide and was much more of a pessimist than she was, but him and Adelaide were still closer than ever. When Adelaide first got sick, Bowie promised to never leave her side. He has kept his promise, and spends every free moment he has being by her side. 

“Good afternoon sunshine, I was wondering when you’d be home.” Bowie stood up from Adelaide's couch and walked towards her to greet her.  
“Hey grumpy, you seem eager to see me. You act like I don’t see you every other day.” Adelaide rolled her eyes and playfully hit Bowie on the shoulder. “Oh shut up. I was just worried about you today that's all. I know you went for more tests today, and I wanted to make sure you were doing okay.” Bowie was always a protective brother over Adelaide, but the one thing that big brothers can’t protect their siblings from is Cancer. All he could do was sit beside Adelaide while she fought. “I’m really good. Dr. Robin is going to call me with the results within the next week, and until we actually see what they say, you and I are going to keep the mindset that everything is fine, capeech?” 

Bowie never understood how Adelaide could walk around with such optimism, but he was glad. He never told Adelaide how scared he was to lose her. Sometimes Bowie felt like he was more scared of Adelaide. When she would be sick and in the hospital she would still hold her contagious smile, while Bowie felt nothing but anger that he could not help his baby sister. 

“If you say so bossy.” Bowie rolled his eyes and giggled at Adelaide, he decided to let his fears of Adelaide’s test results fade for the moment and just be next to his sister.  
“Anyways, I have a good feeling in my heart Bowie. The most incredible thing happened today, and while it sounds way too cliche, I think it was a sign from the universe that things will be okay.” Bowie furrowed his brows as he wondered what in the world could have happened to Adelaide. It was rare that life changing things happened to a small town girl working in a small second hand bookshop out of nowhere. “Well are you gonna just sit there and smile like a weirdo or are you gonna tell me what happened?”  
“I was putting books on the shelves, and out of nowhere, being the clutz I am, I tripped on top of this guy. He had this awkward smile that radiated with a sense of comfort. Anyways, instead of yelling at me, he kindly started talking to me, and also told me a fact about clumsiness as a way of justifying my fall? I don’t know but he was smart. Like REALLY smart, and his name was Spencer. One thing led to another, I’ll spare you the details, but I think that we are going on a date this Saturday.” Bowie’s mouth fell wide open in pure excitement and shock.  
“Looks like my little sister is finally growing up. I’m excited for you Ade. Maybe you’re right, maybe the universe is gifting us with a little bit of good.”  
“No Bowie, I think the universe might be gifting us with a lot of good.”

Adelaide didn’t expect to get the news a week later that she had only a few months left to live. In Adelaide’s mind that day, she truly did believe that the universe was gifting her with more good then she knew was possible. But in a way she was right. Spencer Reid was the best thing the universe could have given Adelaide in her final days. The day that Adelaide was first diagnosed with stage four lung cancer she looked over to Bowie and told him that she would be okay as long as she arrived to her death late and in love. Adelaide achieved this goal once she met Spencer. Adelaide was in love, and she wasn’t mad at the universe. The universe gave her what she wished for, a whole lot of good. The universe gave her Spencer, and to Adelaide that is all that mattered. 

Spencer on the other hand went home that day and did nothing but think of Adelaide. Adelaide’s laughter replayed in Spencer’s head. The way that he hair slightly fell in front of her face when she would blush played like a movie through his eidetic memory. Spencer Reid could not wrap his head around what spell was cast on him when he laid eyes on Adelaide Sutton. That night Spencer grew nervous though. He was nervous that she may not like him, or worse, he was nervous that she would fade away just like every other person he had loved. With this thought Spencer immediately called the one person he knew could help. 

Spencer’s phone rang three times before a familiar voice picked up on the other line. “Hey pretty boy, please don’t tell me we have a case.”  
“Hey Derek, don’t worry we don’t have a case. I’m sorry to bug you but I uh, I didn’t know who else to call.” Spencer didn’t really know why he felt the need to ask Derek for advice, but it was too late to turn back now. “Are you okay?” A slight tone of worry was laced in Derek’s voice.  
“Yeah, I am really good actually. I met a girl today, her name is Adelaide, and I might have sorta asked her out for coffee this saturday. I don’t know what to do though Derek, what if she doesn’t like who I am?” Derek laughed on the other end of the line.  
“Reid, stop overthinking things. You will be fine. If she doesn’t like you and that big brain of yours then that’s her loss.”  
“Thanks Derek. Sorry again for bothering you.” Spencer did feel slightly calmer after talking to Morgan. Spencer knew Derek was right, he was just overthinking things. “Now play on playa.” Spencer rolled his eyes and hung up the phone before Morgan had a chance to bug him even more. 

That night everything was still. Adelaide dreamt of Spencer, and Spender dreamt of Adelaide. The universe knew what it was doing when Adelaide tripped on top of Spencer. It was no accident. And while many would think that it was cruel of the universe to gift Adelaide and Spencer with only a few months together, that was the way it was supposed to be. There was no cruelty behind it, because Spencer and Adelaide loved each other point blank, and that love lasts forever, even if Adelaide did not. 

But this is just the beginning of the story.


	2. all in 24 hours

Time was a really tricky concept for Adelaide. The five days leading up to her date with Spencer felt like an eternity. Adelaide prayed that each minute would pass by faster so that she could wake up Saturday morning and see Spencer Reid once again. The issue was that she only resented the slowness of time those days because she was focused on a future event, keyword being future. Once Adelaide would find out her test results, she would wish for every clock to break so that she could just stay in the now. She would wish for time to stop because she would not know if she even had a future. But Adelaide still did not know that those five days would be the last days where time felt slow, and that is okay. The pure adrenaline rush that ran through Adelaide’s body on Friday night while getting ready for bed made that all worth it, because she could not wait to finally see Spencer Reid, the kind stranger who’s soft eyes burnt a hole inside her heart. 

Saturday morning Adelaide woke up at 8:00 and immediately rushed out of bed to get ready. The sooner she was ready, the sooner she could leave, and the sooner she would be drinking coffee with the man who has consumed her dreams. Adelaide wore a white dress that was lined with buttons in the front. She kept her hair down naturally and only applied light mascara to her face. She finished off her look with an old flannel and a ripped up pair of black converse. Adelaide knew that her outfit was not necessarily the usual first date attire, but she stood by the idea that if they do not like you for you then they simply are not worth it. So Spencer Reid would have to accept her for her ripped up converse, and messy hair. With that Adelaide left her apartment and began her walk down to the small diner near the bookshop. 

Spencer Reid woke up that morning and felt nothing but eagerness to get dressed and leave to see Adelaide. He wore a dark purple button up, with the sleeves rolled up, paired with gray slacks and his traditional black converse. He was anxious, but something in him was whispering that this date would mean so much more, and Adelaide was more than just the bookstore girl. Spencer Reid had a strong feeling that Adelaide was about to become his everything, and although he still had not known much about her, his feelings were correct. 

Spencer arrived at the diner and immediately locked eyes with Adelaide. She was sitting at a small table near the front windows of the diner, her well known smile shining brighter than ever before. Adelaide gave Spencer a small wave as he walked towards the table to join her.

Adelaide felt as if it was christmas morning the moment that Spencer Reid walked into the diner. Her eyes carefully ran down his body, immediately noticing his torn up converse. That is the exact moment that Adelaide decided that the universe most definitely gave her Spencer Reid for a reason. Little did Adelaide know that Spencer had the same thought the moment he noticed her similarly torn converse. 

“Good Morning Spencer Reid. You look quite handsome today.” Adelaide was telling nothing but the truth. “Good morning to you as well Adelaide. You look very beautiful yourself.”   
“Stop it you’re making me blush. And how are you on this beautiful saturday morning?” Spencer giggled at Adelaide as she said this while fidgeting with her rings. Adelaide’s nervousness was visible, but anyone could also see the clear excitement that filled Adelaide’s body as she talked with Spencer. “Well I’m sitting in front of you, how could I be anything but good on this saturday morning? And you?”   
“It seems like a good day to have a good day Spencer Reid. So to answer you, I am incredibly well right now.” 

Some would say that it is impossible to rank a day as the best day of your life when you are only two hours into it, but Adelaide would disagree. In that moment, Adelaide knew that her first date with Spencer would go down as the best day of her life. The day she truly got to see a glimpse of who her everything was. The day that she would hear his voice for the first time in depth, or see the way his hair lightly falls in his face when he would look down. The day that Spencer Reid became a part of her forever. 

“Spencer Reid, are you telling me that you have the ability to read 20,000 words per minute, and yet have only read pride and prejudice once?” Spencer and Adelaide had been talking over coffee for about an hour at this point. Both of them not even focusing on the time, just enjoying each other's presence. “Yes I have only read Pride and Prejudice once. I think that Jane Austen is a fantastic author, and it truly is a good story, but their ending was too perfect.”   
“Spencer Reid, you were doing so good but now I am having second thoughts. That is how love should be. Love is a perfect ending, there is no such thing as it being too perfect. You Spencer, are a crazy man, the BAU should be locking you up right now Mister I have only read pride and prejudice once.” Spencer and Adelaide burst out in laughter over this. “I enjoy your perspective on life and love Adelaide. You have so much happiness, it’s cute. I will tell you what, if you agree to go on a second date with me, then I will read pride and prejudice again.” Spencer had an undertone of nervousness as he said this, but all of his anxiety left his body as a light blush appeared across Adelaide's face as her smile grew even wider. “It’s a deal. Just let me know when and where, and I will gladly go on a second date with you Spencer.”  
“Okay then Adelaide Sutton. It’s a date. I have to see what work is going to look like this week, if we don’t have any cases pop up then I will call you and we can plan dinner?” Spencer hoped with every bone in his body that he would not have a case this week, he wanted to see Adelaide again as soon as possible. “That sounds like an excellent plan Spencer.” With that Adelaide and Spencer continued to talk with nothing but pure passion for one another until it was time for them to part. 

That day Adelaide learned a lot about Spencer. He told her about his job, his favorite books, and his obsession with Doctor Who. Adelaide told Spencer about her love for reading, her brother, and her adoration for making others smile. Adelaide left out the part about her having Cancer though. She did not want to ruin something so fresh and incredible because she had a few cells that multiplied faster than they should. Plus, Adelaide highly doubted that Spencer Reid would have kissed her that day before they parted if she had told him. 

As Adelaide and Spencer walked out of the diner they both stood in front of each other fidgeting, not knowing what to do next. After a few minutes of pure anxiety bouncing off of the two as they creeped closer and closer together, Spencer leaned forward and closed the gap between the two of them. His hand lightly held the back of her head and her hands held his waist. His other free hand gripped the side of her face. This was the precise moment that Adelaide Sutton learned what the many romance novels she stood up at night reading meant when describing a perfect first kiss. While there were no fireworks in the background or a dramatic 80’s love song playing softly as they kissed, the kiss made the world stop for the briefest of time as flames of pure intensity and passion lighted on their lips. 

Spencer Reid loved everything there was about Adelaide. She was like a golden hour, everything had a different glow when she was around. Everything seemed so much softer with Adelaide around, it was as if all the evil and darkness in the world faded away. Adelaide spoke of the world in a way that a little kid would, with a love for all the good there is in the world. Between Adelaide’s torn up converse, and her hopeful perception on life, Spencer Reid knew that she was meant to be his. He could not stop replaying the day in his head, and he could still smell her vanilla perfume. He could taste her peach chapstick, and feel the warmth of her lips on his still. He could hear her giggle, and see the small freckles that lined her face become emphasized as she blushed. Now that Spencer Reid knew that Adelaide existed he did not know how to think about loving anyone else. 

The next day Adelaide had the appointment that would shatter her perfect smile. After her date with Spencer on saturday she received a phone call from her doctor asking her to come in person for her results. Adelaide knew this meant something was wrong, but she did not expect the news to be as bad as it was. She thought that at worst they would just want to add a few more radiation treatments, so she stayed positive about it. The saddest part is that Adelaide got up the morning of her appointment happier than she had ever been before. She dreamt the entire night of her kiss with Spencer. She woke up that morning having fallen for the most perfect human. With thoughts of what her future with him held, of what his next kiss would feel like. She was supposed to keep that feeling, but the moment she set foot in the hospital she saw everyone's faces fall, and she knew what that meant. That is when her face fell too, and her grip on Bowie tightened. 

Bowie always came to Adelaide’s important appointments so the moment he heard that Dr. Robins wanted for her to come in person for her results he knew he needed to be there. Adelaide tried to convince him she would be fine, but this always happened. She expected good news and would have so much positivity about her appointments, and then she would discover bad news and he would have to watch that positivity slowly slip away. 

Bowie and Adelaide were brought into Dr. Robins office and Adelaide looked over to Bowie with slightly worry drawn on her face. “Mac from the front office didn’t smile at me today. And when Jenny signed me in she sounded like she was grieving the loss of me, as if I was not standing right in front of her. Bowie please tell me I am crazy, please tell me that I am not about to get bad news again.” This broke Bowie’s heart into pieces, he hated that he could not do more than hold her hand in this moment. “I don’t know what Dr. Robins is going to tell you today Adelaide. I truly don’t, and I am sorry I can't promise that you aren’t gonna get bad news today. But I can promise you that no matter when, and no matter where, I am right here with you okay?” Adelaide rested her head on Bowie’s shoulder as he sighed and prayed that she would be okay. 

Dr. Robins came into the office a few minutes later. Adelaide had known Dr. Robins since she first was diagnosed with her Cancer, and considered her a mother figure in some ways. Sure, she was the same woman who would cut into Adelaide on a monthly basis, but she always gave Adelaide a sense of comfort. Adelaide felt like Dr. Robins was her own personal angel, and in a way that was true. The day that Adelaide was told she had cancer Dr. Robins looked her in the eyes and said, "I know it's scary but you my dear will be okay, you know why? Because you aren't gonna tell people your plans, you are going to show them your results, and it will all be okay." Those words have stuck with Adelaide ever since, and the moment Dr. Robins said them to her, she knew that she was in good hands. 

“Well if it isn’t my favorite patient. How are we feeling today Adelaide?” Both Bowie and Adelaide knew that Dr. Robins was trying to avoid jumping right into her news. They both knew that they were going to walk out of that office broken. “Besides feeling like everyone here is mourning my death, I’m feeling alright.” Adelaide tried to show a small smile as she said this, but every bone in her body was filled with fear. “Well I want to start this conversation by prefacing that everyone in this office loves you, and we are going to be by your side no matter what. When we received the results from your lab work, we discovered that the radiation has not been working as we had hoped. Unfortunately, you are at stage four metastasis. The cancer spread from your lungs to your lymph nodes and lower cranial area.” In all honesty Adelaide did not know how to react. Tears formed in her eyes, and her throat slightly closed as Bowie sat next to her emotionless and lost. “So what does that mean? Is there a treatment plan or is this going to be my endgame?” Dr. Robins face slightly fell as Adelaide asked this. “Well there are several treatment plans that I would like to discuss with you, but first I do want to warn you that this is not going to be easy. It never was easy, but this is going to be the hardest fight you have ever fought. Realistically, those in early stage four metastatic only have a 5% chance of surpassing the five year mark. Sadly, we did not catch the cancer in your brain soon enough and it has matured rather quickly. The statistics that go with this are rather daunting. Only 19% of those at stage four make it past the 12 month mark. With this, as I said before every person in this hospital is by your side, and we will do everything in our power to help you fight this fight.” Bowie had started crying the moment Dr. Robins mentioned the survival rates. Adelaide was crying but also was in too much shock to truly comprehend what she was just told. “What are the treatment plans?” Adelaide felt weak, she did not have the power to say more than a few words at a time. “Well we would like to start you back on chemotherapy to try and target the tumors on the lymph nodes. Thankfully those are your smallest tumors and hopefully chemotherapy will help fight them off. The most rigorous treatments will be for the tumor on your lower cranial area, as well as the tumor on your left lung. We want to look into doing prophylactic cranial irradiation, or PCI treatments, which is a form of radiation that would target the brain. We also will need to put you on several new medications to control swelling, and prevent you from going into seizures. If the radiation does not react as we want, then we will talk about surgery. As for your lung, we think the best route is for a wedge resection, which would be a minimally invasive surgery where we would go in and remove part of the tumor along with some surrounding tissue. I know that this is a lot of information, and I do not expect you to know what to do right now.”   
“When do you want to start up the chemotherapy?”  
“We want to make sure to get on top of this as soon as we can. We want to start as soon as this week if that is possible.” Adelaide felt like the world was stopped. The air felt poisoned, and she was completely dumbfounded. Before Adelaide could reply, Bowie stepped in. “That was a really big treatment plan, and while it is not my place Dr. Robins, I am asking in the best interest of my sister, will these treatments kill her faster or help her? Because if I heard you correctly then this could be the end, and I do not want her to spend her final days connected to IV’s in a hospital bed.” Bowie never held his tongue, if he had a concern he voiced it. And Adelaide appreciated that he cared so much, but it hurt her to hear him admit that he was fearful of this actually being her end. “I understand your concern Bowie. You are right, every treatment plan comes with its risks and there is a high probability that Adelaide’s cancer has matured too far for these treatments to work. As her doctor, I would urge her to still go through with the treatments, and if we find that they are not working then she can choose what route she wants to go from there.”

Adelaide and Bowie continued to ask questions, and Adelaide’s heart shattered more and more. Eventually Adelaide and Dr. Robins agreed that she would call tomorrow and make a final decision on what her treatment plan would be. First Adelaide wanted to go home and try to understand what the news she had received meant. Adelaide thought that the universe was finally being good to her. She thought that she was finally going to be happy, and that she was going to fall in love. She knew she could not continue to see Spencer though. It would be evil of her to make Spencer fall in love with a dying girl. She never told anyone how hard she cried that night. For the first time ever Adelaide Sutton could not find a reason to shed her smile. 

The next morning Adelaide woke up to Bowie slightly shaking her. “Adelaide, you’ve been sleeping for a while, it’s time for you to get up and take your meds alright?” Adelaide lazily sat up and sighed. “I’m really scared Bowie.”   
“I know Ade. I know. But you know what. The first day you knew you had cancer, you told me you wanted to arrive to death late and in love. And that is exactly what is going to happen. First off, you are going to live longer than the 12 months they are expecting you to live. Second off, you have Spencer still right?” Bowie could tell he hit a sore spot as he said this because Adelaide tensed up. “Bowie, I can’t make Spencer fall in love with a dying girl. He deserves happiness, and I am not going to give him that.”   
“Adelaide, he likes you for a reason. I don’t think you should make this choice for him, I think you should talk to him first. You are the one who taught me that miracles happen, and there is a chance that you survive this and that you have an incredible future with Spencer. Please let yourself experience love.” Adelaide placed her head in her palm as she began to tear up. “You know, on our date I told him that there was no such thing as too perfect of an ending in love stories. I was wrong though, he was right. There is no way that love is that perfect because here I am falling for one of the most incredible humans I have ever met, and before I can even see what we could become I am given 12 months to live.” Bowie knew that Adelaide was overwhelmed by the news that Dr. Robins gave her, so he was not going to push her too much. “Take your medicine and relax for the day. We can talk more about this later.”

Adelaide spent the rest of the day in her bed mindlessly watching bad reality TV shows. Bowie had not seen her this scared before. It was hard to see her so lost, so fearful. He wished with every bone in his body he could cure her cancer for her. That day he did do the one thing he knew he could help with though. That day he snuck into Adelaide’s room and took her phone from her nightstand as she took a nap, and he opened Spencer Reid's contact information and put it in his phone. An hour later he would be sitting in a small cafe waiting for Spencer Reid to show up. An hour later Spencer Reid would discover that the same girl he could not think about not loving, was dying. An hour later the entire idea of love would change.

It’s funny how much can happen in 24 hours. In only 24 hours Spencer and Adelaide had tied their hearts together. In only 24 hours Adelaide had found out she was in her last months, and in only 24 hours Spencer Reid would discover that the happiest girl he had ever encountered was battling one of the worst monsters. But little did Adelaide know, Spencer did not care that she was dying. Spencer still wanted to show her love, and now more than ever he wanted to show her that she was incredible. Adelaide was stuck with her cancer. But she was also stuck with Spencer Reid. And because of that, everything was going to be just fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi lovely humans! I am sorry if this chapter had a lot of medical stuff, I wanted to get that out of the way, the next few chapters have a ton of Spencer in them though so I promise it is about to get good! I really hope you guys are enjoying this story! I am working on getting a playlist put together for this story as well so be looking out for that! Okay I love you guys and if you need anything my inbox is open. Please remember to eat and drink something today! All the smiles, Emeline :) <3


	3. I do not want to break someone so ethereal

Spencer Reid was hesitant to answer his phone when he saw the unknown caller ID pop up on his screen, but he figured that it was related to work so he still chose to pick it up. “This is Doctor Spencer Reid.” The other end was awkwardly silent for a second before Bowie began speaking. “Hi Doctor Reid, I apologize for bothering you but my name is Bowie, I am Adelaide Sutton’s older brother. I wanted to see if you could possibly meet up to talk about something.” Spencer's heart filled with anxiety the moment he realized Bowie was calling.  
“Please don’t apologize, is everything okay?”  
“Everything is as okay as it can be. Would you be available to meet at the cafe on Buckington street in about thirty minutes?” Spencer was already rushing to put on his shoes and walk to the cafe. “Of course, I will see you then.” Spencer hung up the phone before Bowie could even respond and he rushed out of the door. Spencer knew that something was wrong because Adelaide had told him that Bowie was her number one supporter, and that he was always protective over her. Spencer knew that if Bowie was calling him, then something was going on with Adelaide. 

Bowie quietly slid out of Adelaide’s apartment and began the short drive to the cafe. He knew that Adelaide would most likely be mad at him for calling Spencer, but in the long run he just wanted for his little sister to be happy. Bowie would be nothing but cloudy skies if it weren’t for Adelaide. She was his sun, and without her smile shining for the whole world to see, everything was gloomy in his eyes. Bowie pulled up to the cafe and took a deep breath before walking in. The moment he walked into the cafe and immediately could pinpoint who Spencer was. Adelaide had described him perfectly. Adelaide had told Bowie that Spencer Reid was a visual representation of a perfectly binded book. His hair filled with brown curls, his nose a small curved shape, and his torn up converse laid tied on his feet. Bowie thought that Spencer seemed perfect for Adelaide, and as her older brother that was hard to say. 

“Hi Spencer Right?” Bowie said as he walked up to the small table that seated Spencer. “Yes sir, and you must be Bowie?” Bowie nodded and sat down, letting out a breath that he didn’t even know he was holding in. “I really am sorry to meet you like this. I just… Adelaide discovered some rough news today and happiness is something she gives a lot of, but she doesn’t receive it. She seems to be receiving it from you though, and I don’t want her to lose that.” Spencer was having a hard time following what Bowie was trying to say. “I’m not following what you’re trying to say. Is she okay?” Bowie rubbed his palms on the temples of his head, he was not quite sure what he was trying to say himself. “Adelaide has stage four metastatic lung cancer. She was first diagnosed with cancer five years ago, but then went into remission. About a year ago we found out it was back, and she has been undergoing several treatments. Unfortunately when she went in for testing last week, her results came back showing that her cancer had spread to her lymph nodes and lower cranial area. In a lack of better terms the doctor basically told her she is looking at 12 more months of life max. When she found out the first thing she told me was that she was going to let you go, that you should not be forced to love someone who is dying. I didn’t want her to give up though, and I knew the only way I could stop her from giving you up was by talking to you. So that’s why I asked to meet up.” Spencer was speechless, and not in a good way. He was heartbroken that someone who carried such a beautiful presence was facing one of the darkest parts of life. Death. “O-oh. I didn’t know she even had cancer. Is she okay? I mean of course she's not okay okay, but how is she dealing with the news?” Spencer’s eyes were filled with glossy tears, he only knew Adelaide for a small period of time but he had felt like she was going to be his heart for longer than 12 months. He thought that they would fall in love. “She’s been in bed all day. She is not super talkative right now but when we did talk she seemed more upset that she would not have time to love you than she did over the actual cancer.” Bowie knew how odd it must be for Spencer to be sitting and having this conversation. It isn’t every day when your fresh love interests brother calls you to meet up so that he can tell you that she has cancer. “Thank you for calling. Adelaide and I have not been talking for long but I wish she would not have assumed that I wouldn’t want to fall in love with her any less because she has cancer. I asked her out that day because she was a beautiful soul both inside and out, and a diagnosis does not change that.” Spencer gained Bowie’s approval right then and there. This is the exact reason that Bowie called Spencer, he knew that Adelaide would push Spencer away, but Adelaide deserved happiness. That happiness was Spencer. “That’s why I called you. Adelaide is a big ray of sunshine, but this can also be a flaw. She does not want to hurt others, so she pushes them away. She wanted to push you away because she doesn't want to hurt you and I knew I needed to talk to you first. I have never seen her giddy over a boy Spencer. But she is head over heels for you.” This made Spencer smile, he was falling for her too. And while falling in love with someone facing death is incredibly terrifying, Spencer did not care. “Does she know you called?”  
Bowie sighed and shook his head. “No. I snuck into her room to get your number while she was sleeping. She never would have let me call you.” 

Spencer was feeling many emotions at this time. He felt so much anger towards the world. Adelaide’s laughter deserved longer than 12 months. He felt sorrow. Their love story deserved more than 12 months. He felt nervous, and excited about falling for her. He felt confused about how to cope with this all. People write about love all the time, but they do not mention loving someone you know will end up breaking your heart. Spencer wished there was a statistic on this, or a long book that could tell him what to feel. But there wasn’t so all he had to do was trust his gut. 

“I think you did the right thing by calling me, I am thankful you did but I also think you should talk to her about what I said. I do not want to push anything on her, this is her decision and not mine, as much as I hate to say that. If she does decide to continue what her and I have, please tell her to call me. I want to be by her side in any way I possibly can be.” Spencer was drained, and he hoped with every living cell in his body that Adelaide would give him a chance. “Thank you Spencer. I will talk to her. You seem like a very good man, I really appreciate seeing how much you care for my sister. I hope to get to know you more. I know this meeting was probably really weird, but I am thankful you came. Adelaide deserves to be happy.” Spencer and Bowie shared a few more words with each other before Spencer went home to grieve, and before Bowie went home to talk, or more likely argue, with Adelaide. 

That night Spencer did not cry. All Spencer did was sit emotionless on his couch as he read Pride and Prejudice. Spencer was not a very superstitious person, but some part of him hoped that if he kept his end of the deal and read Pride and Prejudice, that Adelaide would keep her end of the deal and go on a second date with him. And then a third. And a fourth. And well… you get the point. Before Spencer had enough time to fully comprehend his emotions though, his phone rang, and it was not Adelaide. It was work, and of course now of all times he had a case. 

When Bowie got home Adelaide was in the kitchen making a pot of coffee. “It’s 8 PM Adelaide, why are you making a pot of coffee?” Adelaide rolled her eyes and continued to focus on the brewing pot of black liquid. “I feel gross, I need energy. Where were you?” Adelaide spoke in a very neutral tone. “I went to have coffee with Spencer.” Adelaide snapped her head back so that she was making direct eye contact with Bowie. “I am too tired to be angry. I do not want to be angry, I am sad and I am scared and Bowie I really do not want to be angry. But what the fuck did you just say?” Bowie knew Adelaide wouldn’t be happy about his visit with Spencer, but he only did it to help her. “You were gonna push him away Adelaide. You were gonna give up on something that might end up being really great, and before you just assumed he wouldn’t want to be with you I wanted you to know how he actually felt. So I called him.” Adelaide leaned her back against the wall and slowly slid down onto the floor in frustration. “Bowie you were in that office and you heard the same thing that I heard. I am dying. Spencer is a good human, I do not want to hurt a good human. It was not your place to make that decision.” Bowie sat down across from Adelaide and sighed. “Do you even want to know what he said?” Adelaide was about to cry, she didn’t even know how to feel about this. “What Bowie. What did he say. That he wanted to love the dying girl. That maybe just maybe everything would be fine, that he was willing to risk losing a woman right after falling in love with her. No Bowie, no. Because it does not work that way.” Bowie grew incredibly frustrated after Adelaide said this. “Actually Adelaide yes. He said that he asked you out that day because of who you were as a person and a diagnosis does not change that. You are the only thing holding yourself back from having love. Not the cancer, not Spencer, you. You are the one who said you wanted to arrive to your death in love. You have the option to do that, you have the option to find love, and I really hope you decide to do something with it. I love you Adelaide but you need to realize that. Not everyone sees you as the dying girl, they see you for who you are and they love you for that. You need to start seeing yourself as more than the dying girl too.” At this point Adelaide was in full blown tears and Bowie was shaking. He automatically felt guilty for losing it on Adelaide, but he just wanted her to be happy and she was frustrating him. “Even if I decided to fucking let myself fall in love it would not do anything but hurt Spencer. Even if he sees my death coming, it will still hurt. Our hearts still hurt even when we already saw something coming and I don’t want to be the reason that such an incredible ethereal human becomes shattered. I am scared to fall in love because I do not want to break him. I see myself as the dying girl because I know I can’t fight forever and that scares the shit out of me Bowie.” Adelaide was standing up at this point and was hysterically pacing as she yelled at Bowie. “Spencer can make that decision for himself, stop trying to make it for him. I know that this is scary, and I can’t imagine how you are feeling Adelaide, but you do not have to fight this fight alone. You have so many people here by your side, so many people who want to see you for more than death and you won’t let them. I don’t know what you fucking want for me to do Ade. I don’t.” Bowie was known for his anger, he never was one to hold it back, and it was taking everything in him not to leave Adelaide's apartment so that he could let it go. “I don’t need you to do anything, and I certainly did not need you to talk to Spencer for me. Just go. I can’t do this, I told you already that I did not want to be angry, and this is not helping. I’ll call you tomorrow. Please just go home. I can take care of myself.” Bowie didn’t even say anything back to Adelaide, he simply got up and left her apartment. 

That night Adelaide cried more than she ever had before, and while she would never admit it to anyone she knew Bowie was right. She could not see past her inevitable friendship with death, and that was stopping her from letting Spencer Reid love her. Adelaide did not sleep that night, she sat on her floor staring at the blank wall and coping with everything that had unfolded in those 48 hours. Adelaide felt like she was spending her last healthy moments on earth just trying to survive.

Spencer went into that work that night and everyone could tell that something was wrong. He was spacing out during the briefing and on the plane he stared at the same page of his book for 20 minutes before flipping the page. All he could think about was Adelaide. He wanted to know she would still give their relationship a chance. More importantly he wanted to hold her, and let her know that it was okay to be scared. He wanted to whisper sweet nothings into her ear, and he wanted to hold her hand on her hard days. He wanted to know that she was still Adelaide, and that she was not going to let this change her smile.

“Come on, spill it boy genius. You have been on the same page for 20 minutes, something is going on in that head of yours. ” Emily walked over to Spencer and sat next to him on the jet. Spencer was hesitant about talking to Emily at first, but he knew he could trust her. “I met a girl two weeks ago.” Emily smiled at the thought of Spencer finally meeting his person. “That’s good! Why do you look so down?” Spencer sighed and looked over at Emily, his bottom lip slowly quivering. “She has stage four metastatic lung cancer. She doesn’t think we should date anymore because she doesn’t want me to fall in love with a dying girl.”  
“Oh Spence. I’m so sorry. Have you talked to her about it?” Spencer slightly shook his head. “Her brother is the one who told me. He said he was gonna talk to her about it, and if she decides she wants to still go out then she will call me. I just feel really lost Em. I think that it is very scary to fall for someone who is so close to death, but also I want nothing more than to just hold her in my arms even though we just started talking. I want her to know she is not alone.” Emily didn’t know what to say to Spencer. In all honesty this is a situation she did not have much advice for. “It is scary but it sounds like you guys really like each other. I think she is scared to continue dating you because she likes you, and does not want to hurt you because of that. She just needs to process this and then I am sure she will call. It will be okay Spencer.” Spencer slightly nodded and Emily gave him a small smile before walking back to her seat on the jet. 

The rest of the night Spencer held onto his phone waiting for a call from Adelaide. It was a hard night, no one slept. No one cried either. No one really let themselves feel anything because all of them felt too confused about how the universe could do this to them. Love was supposed to be perfect and this was nothing but chaos and hurt. The universe had plans though. And in the end while Spencer nor Adelaide knew it then, everything would be okay. And eventually Adelaide would see herself as more than the dying girl. 

Once Adelaide woke from her trance of staring at the wall, she stood up and rushed towards the small desk area in her room. She grabbed a piece of paper, a pen, and an envelope and began writing before she could even think about what she was trying to write. Her heart felt this was the best decision. Words always helped, and even if she never did anything with the letter at least she could try to get everything off of her chest. She began writing and the first words that came out were “Dear Spencer Reid,” and from there she began to write her first of many letters to Spencer. She began to write their love story. 

That letter was the start of the universe's plans. That letter was why Spencer Reid and Adelaide survived only having a few months to love each other. That letter was the start and end of the story. Adelaide just did not know it yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! I cried at the end, but love how this story is coming so far. I love you guys, please take care of yourselves and if you need anything, feel free to message me. Happy reading! All the smiles- Emeline
> 
> P.S. I promise some happy fluff is coming soon!


	4. conversations

Spencer and Adelaide’s story looked like it was going to end the night that Bowie met up with Spencer. It looked like Adelaide was going to run, and let herself only be known as the sick girl. But the moment Adelaide finished writing that first letter she realized that her brother was right. She was seeing herself as the sick girl, but she wanted to see herself as something else. She wanted to see herself as the girl in the bookstore who fell in love with the tall stranger with honey colored orbs. So the following day she woke up and called Spencer. For two humans that had only known one another for a short amount of time, they were already the kind of couple that you see and just know that they are meant to be. The kind of couple that feeds birds in the park and lay in eachothers arms while reading a classic novel. They were soulmates. As cliche as that sounds, Spencer and Adelaide knew each other in infinite lifetimes and everyone could see that.

Adelaide woke up the next day at 6:30 with a feeling that she had not felt in a long time. She felt hopeful. She felt like while the world was colliding beneath her feet, the universe was still handing her something wonderful. She walked to her kitchen and quickly made an iced coffee before putting on a white sweater and her favorite light green skirt. She applied only the smallest amount of light pink lip gloss and threw her hair into a messy french braid. Adelaide was very minimalistic when it came to her appearance. She did not care what others thought of her appearance, she cared only that she felt beautiful in her own eyes, and today she did feel beautiful. She did not care about the light purple bags underneath her eyes or the slight puffiness in her cheeks from crying the night before. She didn’t care that you could see the small scars that lined her body from surgeries and treatments. She did not care that you could see her flaws, because in her eyes she was inevitable. As of today she was the bookstore girl, and nothing more. And with that she sat down on her unmade bed and faced her fear. She called Spencer.

When Spencer looked down at his phone as its ringing echoed through the police station, he did not think it would be Adelaide Sutton calling him. But the moment he saw her name light up across the screen his heart stopped and he picked up immediately.   
“Hello?” Spencer did not want to sound too enthusiastic but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t excited to hear her voice. “Hey Spencer. Is now a bad time? I am sorry to call so abruptly but I-” Spencer automatically cut Adelaide off before she could even finish her sentence. “Don’t apologize, I have been hoping to hear from you.” Spencer knew this was not easy for her and he was truly thankful that she decided to call him. “Oh okay. Well I want to preface this conversation by apologizing for the whole brother calling you and dropping all of this on you thing. I should have been the one to talk to you, not him, and I can’t imagine what place that put you in.” Adelaide spoke with slight hesitation, she honestly was thankful that Bowie told him, because if he hadn’t then Adelaide would still only see herself as the dying girl. But she still felt bad for Spencer having to deal with that. “Hey, it's okay, alright? I am not mad whatsoever. But are you okay? I mean that is kind of a stupid question, of course you aren’t okay but can I do anything?”   
Adelaide was taken back that Spencer wanted to help her before even asking her more questions. He truly did like her, and her heart always belonged to him, it just took time to realize that. “Actually I am okay. I know that sounds weird but today I woke up with hope Spencer. I think that's why I called you? I don’t know why really. Last night I was screaming at my brother about how I couldn’t let you like me but now all I want is to talk to you. It sounds crazy, but it's like they laced my medication with little drops of hope.” Adelaide giggled a little as she stated that last part. “Adelaide, I asked you out that day in the bookstore because I was absolutely mesmerized by you. I don’t care what the doctor said, I like you. A lot. And I don’t really want to stop liking you, so please do not push me away before we have even started our story. Plus I finished pride and prejudice last night, so you have to hold up your end of the deal and go out with me again.” Spencer was smiling as he said this, and while he was so nervous that Adelaide was sick, he was so thankful she wanted to talk to him. “Spencer I am a walking hourglass and my sand has already started pouring away. And there is no flipping me over and resetting the amount of time I have left. You are such an incredible human Spencer Reid, and I do not want that time to finally run out and leave you hurt. I want nothing more than to hold my end of the deal but I really need you to see what you are signing up for.”   
Spencer’s heart shattered slightly when Adelaide said this. He knew she was scared of hurting him, but the thing that made him the saddest is that she cared more about the fact that her death would hurt him over her death itself. “Adelaide Sutton I think you are forgetting that I am technically a genius. I know to read the fine print, and I know to think through everything before making a choice. I am well aware that you are sick, but I still am happy with my decision. I still want to see you. I want to hold your hand and visit you in the bookstore. I want to watch stupid movies with you after your treatments, and watch the sunsets on your good days. Adelaide I have only known you for a short amount of time but we both no it was no coincidence that you ran into me that day in the bookstore. It was not by chance that the day before you found out about your cancer you went out with me. That right there was Aphrodite herself giving you a little piece of hope. That is why you woke up with hope today Adelaide.”

No one would consider Spencer the kind of guy to turn into a poet while talking to a girl. He was always awkward and hesitant. But in this moment he felt more confident than ever, he felt like he needed to start their story. What he didn’t know is that Adelaide already said similar things in the letter she wrote him the night before. And he wouldn’t find out until the day that she was flying in the heavens and looking down on him.

“Spencer Reid you are something else. But you are right. I am sorry for trying to push you away. I just never want to hurt you. I never want to be the reason you don’t smile. You have too nice of a smile for that.” Adelaide was slightly emotional after Spencer said this to her. “Well if you want to see my smile again then how about next thursday night we go on a date? I am not in town right now but I should be home by thursday.” 

And with that Adelaide agreed. Adelaide took the hope she woke up with that day and she agreed to go out with Spencer Reid. When their phone call ended shortly after that Spencer automatically walked back into the police station to see Emily look up at him with hopeful eyes. Spencer slightly smiled and nodded at her, confirming to her that Adelaide called, and that he was okay. Adelaide on the other hand still had one more fear to face that day. Adelaide had to do what she hated most. She had to admit to her brother that she was wrong. That was the one thing that she had in common with Bowie. The both of them were stubborn and the concept of being wrong when it came to their arguments was similar to the idea that pigs can fly. 

When Bowie left that night after arguing with Adelaide he went home and let out every ounce of anger that filled his body. He started hitting every possible thing in sight, throwing empty glasses around and breaking anything that did not hold any level of value to him. He let out his anger at Adelaide's diagnosis. He let out his anger from the argument. He let out his anger that he could not protect his own baby sister. And he let out the anger that he had towards himself for not knowing Adelaide was sick sooner. Once there was nothing left to break he sat on his hardwood floor with a bottle of rich whisky and he drank in silence. 

To say that Bowie felt like hell the next day would be an understatement. Everyone knew that Bowie was an angry person, but they did not know that he would go home some nights and drench his anger in small shot glasses. Bowie hid his habits so perfectly that people never even thought to check in with him at night. Bowie Sutton was a stained glass window. He held so much beauty, and was perfectly pieced together, but once you truly looked into him there was a deeper message behind him. You need to break the glass before you put together the stained glass art, and that is exactly what happened to Bowie. He was stained glass. Beautiful but broken. 

So when Adelaide called him that morning he pretended like everything was fine. He did not tell her that he went home and broke everything in sight, he did not tell her that he drank enough whisky that it pulsed through his veins like the chemotherapy that did for her. He simply answered the phone and put on his mask. He became Bowie Sutton, the big brother, the doof. Not the man who slept on the hardwood floor holding an empty bottle of whisky. 

“Hello?” Bowie sounded slightly frustrated when he answered the phone. He was still angry at Adelaide, but he did not want to cause any more conflict so he was trying to stay somewhat neutral when talking to her.   
“Hey Bowie.” Adelaide hated apologizing to Bowie. She was stubborn. Especially in terms of her brother, so this conversation was difficult for her. “Ade, did you call to be awkward and silent or do you need something?” Bowie did not have the patience that morning to sit on the phone in silence with his sister. “I wanted to say I’m sorry. You were right. I had no right to make that choice for Spencer. I was isolating myself. Now please do not let this apology get to your head.” Both Bowie and Adelaide slightly giggled at the end of her statement. “Wow Adelaide Sutton is apologizing to her big brother. I never thought I would see the day. Could I please have that in writing as well?”   
It did make a piece of Bowie happy that Adelaide thought about what he said. “I still think it was not your place to call Spencer though. If you ever steal my phone while I am sleeping again I will not hesitate to kill you, and Spencer is an FBI agent so he will be able to know the best ways for me to not get caught.” Adelaide sounded serious, but also let out a small and simple giggle towards the end of her statement.  
“I am sorry I overstepped, but I also don’t regret it Ade. You deserve happiness, that's all I want.”  
“Thank you doofus. Being this sentimental with you though is making me die faster than the cancer does so we can stop now.” Bowie and Adelaide both laughed at this statement. They were very close, but they rarely were sentimental unless they needed to be. “Oh thank god, I didn’t know how much longer I could deal with that. I’ll see you later Ade. And say hi to Spencer for me.”   
“I’ll see you for dinner Bowie. Also, you were an ass and stole his number out of my phone so say hi to him yourself grumpy.” Adelaide said this with nothing but laughter, and with that Bowie hung up the phone.

Adelaide clung onto her hope for the rest of that day. She also started another letter to Spencer Reid. Bowie cleaned his apartment and began to organize his calendar so that it had each and every one of Adelaide's appointments written on it. Adelaide was his priority. And Spencer spent that day at work smiling because he was falling, and he was falling hard. 24 hours prior to that day everyone felt so lost. They felt like they were intertwined in a spider web that only got more and more complex. But now they were spending their time doing simple things that any other person would do. That day all three of them also had the same thought buried in their heads though. Each of them were filled with thoughts of worry. Worry about what Adelaide would feel like in just a few months time. What she would be able to do. What treatments she will be undergoing. Each of them were terribly scared of how much longer there would be a bookstore girl.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi lovely humans! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Remember you are loved and I adore you. Drink some water and take care of yourselves. If you ever need anything my inbox is open always! Until next time lovelies :)  
> \- Emeline <3


End file.
